Exercising My Faith

I don't enjoy exercise. Oh, I don't mind tricking myself into it once in a while by playing an active game (i.e., tennis), but I don't like the everyday kind of exercise that one really should do to stay in some state of good health. I admit it. I realize it, but I have to will myself to get up off the couch and do it.

Unfortunately, I have that same approach to the disciplines of my faith as well. Oh, I like to think that I can just get in touch with God on my terms and in my own good time, but I know that I always end up being the big loser on that score.

This last week, I decided to discipline myself better in my daily prayer time and bible study. I started out well, and I was starting to feel closer to God, but then, something happened and I got distracted. That distraction turned to apathy and apathy to distance. My best laid plans disintegrated by only Wednesday. I suck at this discipline thing--and exercise, too.

Still, even though I don't exercise my faith like I should, I always seem to be involved in some conversation about it or writing something about it. I hope it counts for something. Sometimes, friends will share with me the problems that they are facing. I usually listen, sympathize, and offer to pray. I rarely offer to pray and not follow through. Recently, I let one of our seniors know that I would be praying for her, and she looked at me and said, "You always tell the truth, don't you?" I smiled and told her that I try really hard not to promise if I think that I can't follow through.

You might catch me praying at my desk in the mornings sometimes. I will remember someone and think to pray for them. You might catch me praying on my way to work while driving. I do that out loud and have had some pretty awesome prayers. I don't feel like I need to close my eyes, you'll be happy to know.

I'm pretty good at being in the moment with prayer, but scheduling it is a whole other issue for me. I don't do schedules all that well, I guess. I think it must be the artist in me. So, I keep my prayer loose and fancy free. I mix it up a bit.

I have the most interesting conversations about faith with coworkers, friends, carpool partners, and whoever steps into the lunch room between the hours of 11:30 to 12:30. So, I guess if unscripted exercising counts, then I am exercising my faith practically all the time.

Still, I feel the need for some deep, quiet time with God. I know I have to do it, and it might mean that I get up a little bit earlier, but I have to do this thing. I need to make that connection from deep in my soul so that I can be all filled up when people ask me to empty myself for them. That's why I need it. I can't keep getting more and more empty. I need a refill and a deep connection with God always fills me up. So, maybe I just need another term than exercise. Exercise feels too hard. Maybe it's quality time that I need with God. Maybe I need to start treating my morning quality time like diving into a box of chocolates or sitting in a hot bath tub with bubbles up to my neck. Yeah, not like exercise at all.