Saying Goodbye to Newton

I didn't even have an argument to give tonight when I received the sad news that Compassion International had discontinued funding the project group whom my sponsored child belonged to. As they explained over the phone that I would not be able to contact my child or even send a last letter or payment, I was stunned. I wasn't able to control the tears as I finally let Bill from Compassion off the line. I felt like I just had a child ripped from my arms.

I took my conversation to the next level and asked for a supervisor who could explain to me the reasons that they released my child's project, but all they could say was that there was financial mismanagement and that opportunities were given and warnings not heeded. That doesn't do anything for the sadness that I feel right now. All I can say is that Compassion International could have found a better solution.

In the blink of an eye, 250 children were released because of this decision. My child was the son of church workers. Because of my sponsorship, I put him through seven years of schooling and would often receive reports from him on his progress. He was a real kid of faith, too. Newton would start every letter with "Greetings in the name of our Lord, Jesus Christ!"

Newton was always interested in our son. He wanted me to have Noah send him a letter once in a while and he always asked about our dog, too. In return, I sent him long letters encouraging him to continue his studies. I had ideas of meeting him one day or perhaps finding out that he went to university and became a doctor. It was just a hope. A hope that I don't have anymore. It was torn into pieces with the call that I received.

I spent the evening surfing the internet trying to find the city that Newton resides in until my eyes got tired and I knew I had to give up. What's the use? My son went to bed early and my husband's anger burns, but me, I am just sitting here lost, feeling like a mother who has lost her child--and I have. No, maybe not my own child, but I've lost the child that I spent seven years encouraging and it hurts.

If you get a moment, pray for Newton Sunderas in Chennai, India near Anupampattu. Newton's Jesus will be with him, even though I can no longer be there. Newton, someday if you wonder about us and you are looking for the people who put you through much of your school, find me and drop me a line. I want to know whether you became a doctor, a minister, or a street sweeper. Whatever you become, I just want to hear from you. God Bless you and your family.